I’m Torn Over Beautiful Things

beautiful things

I want to produce beautiful things. Things people really need – not just things we convince people they need.

Beautiful things means things that improve other things:

  • Appearances of walls or websites
  • The way someone views him or herself
  • The way a group views itself

I want to shift the perspective of others. Change how things appear….or how they appear to appear. Stir conversation and then participate in the conversation, and have the other participants be people with whom I genuinely want to interact…or at least are people who have worthwhile interactions amongst themselves. (Fake “communities” of low-committal users bore me in a way that is beyond boring. I’d literally rather sit on my ass on the floor of a New York City street corner and engage in small-talk with passersby, than dedicate time and energy toward “building a following” for a brand/product/company that doesn’t have its shit together and is solely relying on “marketing magic” and manipulation.)

On one hand this feels like the most natural thing in the world to want. On the other, it’s too vague to matter. I think there’s a Creative Director out there somewhere, in Portugal or Thailand or Westchester who will one day find this blog and say “By golly, this girl’s got it!”

I crave real shit. Real company shit. Promoting things with value.

Beautiful things.

Children and Travelers are Artists

picasso quote

 

You grow up. Your taste evolves. You constantly decide what looks good and what doesn’t.

Getting dressed. Cutting your hair. Choosing a background image for your iPhone’s Lock Screen. Your desktop screensaver. What to hang on your walls.

These things matter to me a great deal; my surroundings have always informed my mood and disposition. The weather outside and the decor in my living space: the space in which I exist shapes and informs my identity, in a way.

The essence of travel implies a lack of commitment to one’s surroundings. It’s easier to experience the world through the eyes of a child; your “tastes” are constantly challenged and tested.

You are reborn.

A Colorful Path To Clarity

Part of "Central Bus Station" street art project, Tel Aviv

Part of “Central Bus Station” street art project, Tel Aviv

There’s so much I want to say to no one in particular, yet everyone at the same time.

I think anyone who blogs — or even tweets or posts on Facebook can identify with that. I’m very cognizant of my digital footprint; I decided a few years back to be less self-censoring in favor of preserving an authentic, honest voice. If a future employer won’t hire me because of something I’ve said on Twitter or my own blog(s), so be it. I typically don’t filter my words offline, so it feels even harder to do so online when I’m technically only talking to myself anyway. I just happen to be allowing other people to listen.

The Pursuit of Clarity

There have been countless times over the last few years when I strongly got the urge to blog about something specific;  “this would make for an interesting blog post” – yet I fail to execute. I have friends who have told me they’d subscribe to my blog. I get paid to blog for clients. Yet when it comes time for me to put my thoughts on screen I choke of some kind of lack of clarity. I want to stop thinking of this as a bad thing. I might not be the most focused but I am never bored and constantly see patterns between my disperse interests.

Everything Goes Back to Art + Words

I could drown in a sea of metaphors and learn to breathe just fine. I think about going back to school for graphic design or becoming an art director at an ad agency. I have things to say and specific ways of saying them.

I’m inspired by creative and eloquent voices behind blogs like the beautifully illustrated and poignantly hysterical Hyperbole and a Half (who also recently re-emerged like all brilliant phoenixes) the endlessly enlightening Brain Pickings, which feels like a continued liberal arts education online; and the quirkiness of Snotting Black and my good friend, comedienne and writer Kate Nicholls. I’m no feminist, but these all happen to be women who express creativity and perspective with effortless style. I’d like to join them.

I’m still figuring out what my unique “thing” is. It’s going to be some kind of “branding campaign” which will be a challenge since I gravitate toward contradiction over consistency. That’s actually probably what my “thing” is. Now I have to find a way to express it.

Hello, World. I’m back.